If you gathered together all the stuff in your house that you never use and put it in a pile in
your living room, it would go clear to the ceiling. Think of all the things that you've spent
perfectly good money on that lay forgotten, hidden or covered with clothes - the exercise
machine you bought after watching that late-night infomercial, your fondue pot or that
copy of Crime and Punishment that you've always meant to read.
Put down the paper and go stick your head out the window.
No - really... go do it; we'll still be here when you get back.
(Waiting, whistling.....)
There. Did you take a deep breath? Yeah? Well, what did you smell?
No, no, no! Stop looking at the bottom of your shoe! What did you smell OUTSIDE?
Damp earth? Lilacs? Rain on the pavement? You know what you smelled? Springtime,
that's what.
It's time to go dust off the biggest item in that pile of stuff you don't use - your mountain
bike. Sure, sure - you've MEANT to take it out for a spin, but stuff came up, then the
weather started to get cold, then the Holidays were going full blast, then it was Winter...
But now, NOW is the time to get out there and go mountain biking.
You've been meaning to. You know you'll feel better for having done it. It would be great
to justify all that money you've invested in that bike. Get changed and get out there! And
the groovy thing about mountain biking (Yes, "groovy". Sorry - it just slipped out.) is that
the weather is perfect for it. If it is sunny and warm, you'll be happy just being outside. If
it's cloudy, windy and a little nippy, don't worry - you'll get warmed up really quickly. And
if it's raining - if it's RAINING, then zowwie! - perfect! Haven't you always secretly
wanted to be one of those wild, thrasher-types, covered with mud that stomps into a coffee
bar, orders a triple espresso and says, "Hey, sorry about the mud - I've just been out
mountain biking!"? (Mountain biking is unique in that the more messed up you get, the
better you look.)
So get out there! But wait! Where will you go? You don't want to go too far. You don't
want to devote a whole day to going. Most of all, you want something that will ease you
into mountain biking gently. OK - here's a great little mountain bike trail, right in the
Keene area: We'll call it the "Oh That One" Trail. It doesn't actually have a name, but if
you describe it to any local mountain bikers, they will frown with concentration for a
moment, then go, "Oh! THAT one! That's a neat little trail!"
Ready? OK - let's go.
Start at Central Square in Keene. Make sure that your helmet is on securely. Do you have
water in your water bottle? Watch for traffic, step up onto your peddle, swing your leg
over the bike and head off down Washington Street, past the police station. Go 1/2 mile
north, until the street forks at the Recreation Center. Take the left fork. Go one block
down and take a left onto North Street. (If you have an odometer and are paying attention,
it should say 3/4 of a mile at this point.)
Go one block, then turn right onto Elm Street, just past the North Street Market. Ride
down the street, past Fuller School to the highway underpass. Just past the bridge, on your
right, there is a road called Timberlane Drive. Stop right there. If you look up the road,
you will see that it goes uphill for very long way. DON'T BE INTIMIDATED! You can
do this! Who's tougher - you or some hill?
(OK, probably the hill, but for the sake of argument, let's say it's you.)
Take a deep breath and a squirt from your water bottle. The real mountain biking starts
here. Have faith - it WILL be worth it!
Head up the hill. You will almost certainly have to downshift several times. (If you've ever
asked yourself why anybody would need 18 or 21 speeds on a bicycle, you'll get your
answer now.) Climb the hill for about 1/2 of a mile, until the road levels out slightly and
bears to the right. If you look to the left, in the woods, you will see a couple of metal trash
cans with a chain between them. That is your trail.
Lift your bike over the chain and head on up the trail. If you are a beginner, (and if you
are reading this, you probably are), you will want to keep your bike in a low gear. If you
are REALLY a beginner, that means that of the three front gears up near your pedals, you
want to avoid the big one for now. Don't worry about the back ones - a little
experimentation will teach you very quickly which ones to use.
Now for the bad news.
This trail will keep going uphill for the next several miles.
Don't worry - it's not that bad! It's not one big hill that you have to get through in one shot;
it's a series of smallish, manageable hills that you can do one at a time. You can do this!
Just keep peddling and swear a lot. (Don't worry - profanity plays a central role in
mountain biking.)
After a mile or so of some fairly vigorous riding (even if you are in good shape, your heart
will really be pounding), you will come to a break in the woods by some power lines. Take
this opportunity to look down the hill at Keene. The view is pretty amazing, as are the
wildflowers, birds and other "nature stuff" that you don't normally take the time to
appreciate. Chances are, right now you feel like you are about to drop dead and will
welcome the chance to appreciate Nature one last time.
As you head back into the trail on the other side of the fire-break, you will see the first of
the big mud pits. This is where you have to make a decision - are you the type of prudent
person who will ride around the pits (they are a little too big to call "puddles") and take the
risk of losing your balance and falling in or are you the type that will charge right through
them, seize the gusto and get really dirty? If you do charge right through, one word of
warning - KEEP PEDDLING! Everyone dreams of coasting through mud with a maniacal
laugh and a sparkle in their eye, but if you don't pedal REALLY HARD, you will bog
down, slow to a stop and flop over on your side in the mud before you can get your feet
out of the stirrups. That can be embarrassing.
[This is as good a place as any to bring up the subject of falling. You WILL fall from your
bike. It's one of the hazards of mountain biking. Don't get stressed about it. As a
beginner, you will never be going fast enough to be injured. If you are wearing your
helmet, you will be fine, though you may have to answer some pointed questions later
about the bruises on your thighs.]
At this point, you are almost done with the hard part of the ride. There will be a couple of
challenging smaller hills, but they will be challenging in the sense of "Hey! Wow! I didn't
know I could do that!", not in the sense of "This is hard. I hate this!"
The trail will end almost exactly 5 miles from Central Square. It SEEMS a lot longer, but
really - it's only been 5 miles. You will see a house on your right with a tire swing, a road
that goes straight and one that goes to your left. Go left. (At this point, you will be
wondering, "Where am I?" You are in Gilsum. Don't sweat it - you'll be home before you
know it.)
The next half mile is pretty tricky (go slowly), but it is very, very fun. It is a downhill
stretch with a lot of rocks. Go even slower than you think you should. Really - it IS fun!
(One tip - do most of your braking with your front brake. That seems odd until you get
used to it, but it is the best way to slow yourself while keeping control of your bike.)
When you get to the bottom of the hill, stop and take a breather. You deserve it! You
have done great! Have a drink of water and clear your head. This next stage is so
amazingly fun that it will make all the work you've just done worth while. You are on a
dirt road. This dirt road will turn into a paved road, but one with very little traffic. You
will be able to bomb straight downhill for about 3 miles. It is very fast, but very safe and
(at the risk of being redundant) very, very fun.
Ready, steady.......GO!
Zoom downhill. Feel the wind on your face. Do that maniacal laugh that you forgot to do
back at the mud pit. Let out a Rebel Yell. Woo hoo.
Eventually, the road will end in a "T". Take a left onto East Surry Road. Follow this for
about a mile, and it will empty out onto Court Street. Take another left and ride the last
mile or two into town. If you feel like it, grimace a lot, so that the motorists know that you
are really a mountain biker!
Even though it feels like you've ridden all day, you will be surprised to see that you've only
been gone for just over an hour. The trail that you just did is a fairly modest 10 1/2 miles.
It gives you a taste of what mountain biking is all about, without being overwhelming. The
great thing about mountain biking is that it is a great workout, but is a lot of fun WHILE
you are actually doing it, instead of in that "Ugh! This will be good for me in the long run"
sort of way.
Now you've actually gone out mountain biking and even if you don't do it again this year,
you can still feel like you're getting your money's worth out of the bike.
